Every year for the last few years, I have chosen a word to guide my year instead of making resolutions. I was never really into resolutions, they just didn’t work for me. Ever since I heard of the idea of choosing the energy of a word to “live into” through the year, I was fascinated by the idea.
Last year I chose Grace. There are so many beautiful definitions of grace. Divine favor, elegance, ease. For me, the idea of grace was connecting with the divine in a deeper way and letting that higher light lead.
One of my dearest friends, Fawn from Happy Wives Club, reminded me early last year that grace was not just something to accept, but something to give to others.
Her wisdom stayed with me all year long. I hope in some small measure I have been able to extend a portion of the grace that has been showered upon me. I am still working on that.
So grace. That was my word. It came upon me like an avalanche:
- A beautiful wedding that became a family reunion with all my half- sisters and my dad in one room. I didn’t grow up with my dad so at 41, this was the first time we were all in one room together.
- Attending Oprah’s Life You Want Weekend and being moved at the last minute – TO THE FRONT ROW. I swear the beautiful Miss O looked straight at me and said, “The life you want is possible.” There is a whole series of blog posts that needs to be written about that one. (on my list for 2015!)
- The infinite amount of small, happy moments with the hubs – cuddling while watching our favorite shows, laughing with our friends, planning vacations, going to Home Depot or just checking in after a long day.
- Getting quoted in Brides, re-designing this website, writing my very first e-book (in final edits as I write this).
- The blessing of sharing life and love with all of you here on the blog or on Facebook every day.
These are all things that I could have never anticipated, except for the hubby parts, which we intentionally create, all the rest had the sprinkle of Divine Grace and mountains of gratitude and thanksgiving from my side.
Yes, I also had the flu, had to see a hand doctor for possible carpal tunnel (thankfully not), had to see a specialist about a root canal gone wrong (yes it was as painful as it sounds) and had many days when napping was not just a priority, but a necessity because my body was tired to the point of clinical exhaustion from so much work.
I then had multiple internal struggles on how to balance wifehood, career life, and sanity. Still working on that one too.
My experience is that once you live with a word for a whole year, it never leaves you. The first word I ever chose was courage. It’s still the foundation of so many decisions I make every day. And grace, I think was always with me, but now I know what it looks like and will never take it for granted again.
When it came time to choose this year’s word, it came to me in a moment.
Embody – to represent (something) in a clear and obvious way : to be a symbol or example of (something) / to make concrete and perceptible (Merriam Webster)
If last year was connecting with the divine in a bigger, clearer, more intimate way, this year is all about making the divine concrete, holdable, touchable, measurable.
I want to learn how to move my body consistently and lovingly.
I want to take all the principles I believe in and claim to know and live them. Prove them. Embody them.
This experience has been so powerful for me, that my hubby has started choosing a word too.
Last year, his word was “ass-kickery.” I will save you a great debate on whether this is a word or not and let you know that much marital peace can be achieved when you let each other create words as needed.
Also, per the urban dictionary it is in fact, “the art of kicking ass.”
And that he did. He slayed his move to a new data center. He crushed his audits. He kicked mega booty.
Which is good.
Then he was exhausted. Which is, not as good.
This year, he chose “flow.” He is trying another way.
I love that about him. And about life and marriage. Do overs are just the best invention since the shellac manicure.
We added something this year. We each have a word and we chose a theme together. A theme for us as a couple.
Our theme? Do it with fun.
The hubby came up with it. Of course. Add that to the 574 reasons why I love that man.
Do it with fun. It sang to me.
One of my favorite movies is Arthur Christmas. Yes, as I write this I am 41 years old. Don’t judge. Or if you judge, then immediately rinse please. Like a thought-washing-machine.
As I was saying…
In Arthur Christmas, Arthur is very worried about a child being missed on Christmas. He doesn’t want her to think Santa forgot her. See why I love this movie? Aren’t you glad you rinsed? 😉
He struggles throughout the movie with a long list of worries until in a moment of total revelation and glee, he realizes he can do what needs to be done while worrying.
He can “do it with worry.” When I first saw that scene it was so liberating. Like I don’t have to have the mysteries of life figured out, I can just do the whole damn thing with worry.
Insert massive weight just lifted off shoulders right here.
Ever since then the hubs and I have a whole “do it with worry” thing where we just, you know, get it done as best we can, Arthur Christmas style.
What happens after you do that for a while is you realize, you could do it, whatever “it” may be, a whole variety of ways –
With worry
With fear
With confidence
With trust
With fun
And there we were having breakfast at Denny’s talking about our words for the year when I was about to spring on the hubster this wild idea I had that our words should be individual but we should add a twist with a united “theme.”
I had read on someone’s Facebook that her theme was “I am ready.” Whatever came at her all year long, she just said, Okay, “I am ready,” here we go.
Sounded like a great idea to me.
The Hubs meanwhile, being the love of my life and all, spontaneously said, you know what? This year I am going to “do it with fun.” Just like that. Out of the blue.
Hello Theme.
Done.
Insert googlie-lovey-dovey-wifey-smile-here.
We have a lot on our plate this year. Some if it is very routine and number-crunchery and some of it is awesome without even trying.
We have decided, whether its groceries, tax returns, date nights or vacations, we are going to “do it with fun.”
We started with a very vigorous body-shaking dance in the car to Taylor Swift on the way to Home Depot.
So, your LoveWork this week is #1 Choose a word. And if you are feeling really adventurous, share it in the comments or tweet it to me here: https://twitter.com/modernmarried!
#2 for total bonus, extra credit points – choose a theme. One sentence. Something easy that you can whip out any time, any day of the year and hold onto like a lucky charm all year through.
To read about my experiences with previous words and get my personal recipe for how to choose one, click here: http://modernmarried.com/word-of-the-year-how-to-choose-one-word-to-turbo-charge-your-year/
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Now go love and be loved. And do it with fun. XO
